Bogans in Paradise

If you are a super-keen reader of this blog, then you may have noticed that cherished reader "Tutti Frutti Rosa Venuti" has placed a special request.

After realising that EuroTrash has a keen eye for spotting fashion trends, Signorina Tutti Frutti has requested EuroTrash to scour the streets of Bella Roma to find "Bogans in Paradise". It is our sad duty to inform you, dear reader, that there are indeed many bogans in this paradise-land. The streets of Italy do seem to be fairly littered with specimens of the breed Boganis Travellaris, although there was one very exciting spotting of the more rare breed Boganis Italianus Nativis.

Be astounded as you witness this parade of bluuurgh!

SPECIMEN ONE:

This specimen was found INSIDE Saint Peter's Basilica in the Vatican. From the waist up, she appears to be relatively normal; the keen Boganis-spotter will note that below the waist however, the pink pyjama pants combined with ugg-boots doth betray her true identity as a Boganis-backpackis. She may have thought that by covering up she was showing some respect for the fact that she was in a place of Christian worship. Unfortunately, just after this picture was taken, a bolt of lightning struck her from the ceiling of the basilica and she was smote for crimes against all of Creation.

SPECIMEN TWO:

This is a juvnile specimen of the Boganis family, Boganis brittanicus, spotted in the grounds of the Vatican City. Identified by the "London" marking on its back and the protrusion of hair at the rear base of the skull, the Boganis brittanicus is expected to grow into one of the most powerful species of Boganis known to humankind. This species of Boganis is particularly fascinating. When fully grown, this very specimen of Boganis brittanicus will undertake an annual pilgrimage to the mating grounds of Ibiza off the coast of Spain. In an effort to attract a member of the opposite sex, the plume of hair at the rear of his head will be displyed in its full glory much in the same way a peacock displays his plumage, thereby attracting a female member of this species, the Boganis brittanicus minger. She will respond to his mating dance by displaying her bleached-white hair and performing a dance whereby the palms of her hands will be shown in their best light. This is to show the Boganis brittanicus the orange streaking on her hands from when she applied copious amounts of fake tanning cream.

SPECIMEN THREE

Dear reader, we have arrived at the rare Boganis italianus nativis. It was with great delight that EuroTrash spotted this prime specimen. Behold it in all its glory without further ado for words cannot describe the wonder which was spotted today just off Via del Corso, a very fashionable shopping street:

And here we have a little more of a close up:

If you are able to look closely enough, you will see that his singlet is made of mesh-like material, thereby allowing easy viewing of his ample stomach, chest hair and man-breasts. Above his left nipple (unfortunately obscured by his crossed arms) is a patch sewn onto his attractive singlet which said "SPECIAL DELIVERY".

Indeed.

Happy Boganis spotting everyone!

Ciao,

-EuroTrash.